guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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