Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize