My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize