PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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