ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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