i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
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Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
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I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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