real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
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Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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