Is it normal to miss your booty call?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize