Having a random hookup so left but love u
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize