I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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