I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize