Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I just found a bag of teeth...
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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