if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize