At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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