Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize