Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize