Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
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