either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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