Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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