wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
You can't motorboat a personality
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Randomize