So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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