Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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