Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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