My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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