please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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