Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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