Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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