i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
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You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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