That's when you crack a 10am beer
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize