my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize