Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
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I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
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1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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