So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
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