where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize