Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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