have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
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Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
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Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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