Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
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We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
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I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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