walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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