2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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