i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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