everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
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That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
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You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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