I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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