Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
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