evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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