drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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