He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize