I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize