bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
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his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
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We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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