At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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