meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize