I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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